Construction Law in Virginia at Posterous

Musings on Construction Law and My Journey into Social Media (Comments Always Welcome) 
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The Muppets: Bohemian Rhapsody

I couldn't resist!

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Why Litigators shouldn't marry (via Courtoons)

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Can Church-and-State Issues Be Funny? Hell, Yes - Lowering the Bar

Holy Hullabaloos

I am way overdue in suggesting that you buy a copy of Jay Wexler's book, Holy Hullaballoos: A Road Trip to the Battlegrounds of the Church/State Wars.

At the outset, given that the FTC is now regulating blog endorsements, I guess I need to disclose that Jay sent me a free copy of his book, which, unless he goes around giving out free things for no reason to people he's never actually met, I assume he did in the belief that I would write a positive review of it if I liked it.  So, please be advised that the author of this review has received what might be considered an in-kind exchange currently valued at approximately $13.60 from the author of the product he is reviewing, and incorporate that into your decision-making process accordingly.

While I'm on that topic, I noticed that the FTC's website says it has its own blog, which I immediately planned to mock on the assumption I could catch it making an implied endorsement of something or other (most likely, the FTC).  But if you go to the "FTC Blogs" page, what you find is not a blog but rather a link to what appears to be a PDF of a printout of a blog that the FTC once started but apparently lost interest in after about a week.

I would be more comfortable with having the FTC regulate blogs if it had stuck with its own for more than five posts.

It's Justice Alito, With a Green Bunny on His Shoulder

Anyway, back to the book, which is a great read.  Jay Wexler is a professor at Boston University School of Law who has also written very funny stuff that has appeared in Spy Magazine, McSweeney's, and many other places.  You may remember "Laugh Track," in which he determined who was the funniest justice by means of counting up the references to "(laughter)" after each justice's name in argument transcripts.  (Hint: it wasn't Justice Thomas.)  This analysis, for which I congratulate him although I am frankly pissed that I didn't think of it first, was reported in the New York Times and on Nightline.  So he has a record of good comedy writing, although, as he would probably admit, he is a crappy painter.

The new book is also very funny as well as educational, and taking a humorous approach to this particular subject is all too rare.  The book is a "road trip" story similar to Sarah Vowell's Assassination Vacation, in which the author travels to places where famous events took place and uses that as a framework to discuss the issues involved.  The book begins at a bar called "Grendel's Den" that once had its liquor license vetoed (temporarily) by a church, moves on through Amish school districts, Santeria ceremonies in Florida, and (possibly strangest of all) a high-school football game in eastern Texas.  When you actually travel to these places, you get access to unique experiences, like this one involving an interview with a Santeria practitioner: 

[H]e was telling me about a memorable encounter with an anthropologist in the 1970s, when suddenly from the back room came a burst of chanting and banging and other sounds of worship.  Pichardo stood up and motioned for me to do the same.  Pichardo's wife came into the living room, put some chalk on both of our foreheads, and then returned to the back room.  We sat down a minute later when the chanting stopped and continued our discussion as if nothing had happened.  Stuff like this happened all afternoon. 

The book also contains the sentence, "What are you, the Amish police?" which by itself would probably have been enough for me to buy the book, had I not already gotten it for free as clearly disclosed above.

You, too, should either start a blog that might eventually convince Jay to send you a free book in hopes of having you review it, or -- and believe me this is a much easier route -- buy yourself a copy, which you can do here directly from Amazon via the author's website.

Link: Holy Hullaballoos - the Book
Link: Holy Hullaballoos - the Blog

This one was too funny just to post at Twitter! Thanks for the great post at Lowering The Bar.

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Filed under  //   humor   law   lowering the bar  

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Courtoons Rides Again!

This is my kind of Courtoon! Puns are great!

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Filed under  //   courtoons   david mills   humor  

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Courtoons are Funny

I have been reading (and often sharing on Twitter) the insights and humor of Courtoons by David MIlls.  These little, one frame, gems (like today's) are great insights into the sometimes odd workings of how we as lawyers train the next generation and act ourselves.

Frankly, I think lawyers should laugh at themselves more often.  I find myself laughing at my chosen profession (and myself) almost daily.  Without this humor we are likely to be less humble and also less able to deal with the clear downturn in the legal market.

I hope that you all find these snippets funny and that they give you all a bit of a smile during a busy day.

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Filed under  //   courtoons   david mills   funny   humor   lawyer  

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This is funny (Green Building Jokes)

BuildingGreen.com has posted some green building humor that is good fun.  I reccomend checking it out.

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Disorder in the Court

These are actual Court recordings from a book called Disorder of the American Courts, and are things people actually said in Court, word for word, taken down and now published by Court Reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Attorney:      Are you sexually active?
Witness:       No, I just lie there.

Attorney:      What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
Witness:       Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Attorney:      This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
Witness:       Yes.
Attorney:      And in what ways does it affect your memory?
Witness:       I forget.
Attorney:      You forget?  Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Attorney:      What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
Witness:       He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Attorney:      And why did that upset you?
Witness:       My name is Susan!

Attorney:      Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
Witness:       We both do.
Attorney:      Voodoo?
Witness:       We do.
Attorney:      You do?
Witness:       Yes, voodoo.

Attorney:      Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
Witness:       Did you actually pass the bar exam ?

Attorney:      The youngest son, the 21 year old, how old is he?
Witness:       Uh, he's 21.

Attorney:      Were you present when your picture was ta ken?
Witness:       Do you really know what you said?

Attorney:      She had 3 children, right?
Witness:       Yes.
Attorney:      How many were boys?
Witness:       None.
Attorney:       Were there any girls?
Witness:       Are you joking? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney.  Can I get a new attorney?

Attorney:      How was your first marriage terminated?
Witness:       By death.
Attorney:      And by whose death was it terminated?
Witness:       Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?

Attorney:      Can you describe the individual?
Witness:       He was about medium height and had a beard.
Attorney:      Was this a male or a female?
Witness:       Guess.

Attorney:      Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
Witness:       No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Attorney:      Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
Witness:       All my autopsies are performed on dead people.  Would you like to rephrase that?

Attorney:      All your responses MUST be oral, okay?  What school did you go to?
Witness:       Oral.

Attorney:      Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
Witness:       The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Attorney:      And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
Witness:       No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!

Attorney:      Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Witness:       Huh?  Are you qualified to ask that question?

And the best for last.

Attorney:      Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Witness:       No.
Attorney:      Did you check for blood pressure?
Witness:       No.
Attorney:      Did you check for breathing?
Witness:       No.
Attorney:      So, then is it possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
Witness:       No.
Attorney:      How can you be so sure, doctor?
Witness:       Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Attorney:      I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
Witness:       Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

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